05-03-15 - Waterproof

I have 3 rain jackets. They all let rain through.

Granted, the first one is actually labelled "water resistant" or "water repellant" or some such nonsense which actually means "fucking useless". But the other two are actually described as "waterproof". And they just aren't.

They seem waterproof at first. Water beads up and runs off and nothing goes through. But over time in a rain they start to get saturated, and eventually they soak through and then they just wick water straight through.

The problem is they're all some fancy waterproof/breathable technical fabric.


Ooo we have this new fancy fabric. NO! No you don't. You have bullshit that doesn't fucking work.

Job #1 : Actually be waterproof.

But it's lighter!, you say. Nope! Zip it! But it's breathable. Zip! Shush. But it's recycled, and rip-stop. Zip. Nope. Is it waterproof? Is it actually fucking waterproof? Like if I stand out in a rain. No, it isn't. Throw it out. It doesn't work. You're fired. Back to the drawing board.

If you want to get fancy, you could use your breathable/not-actually-waterproof material in areas that don't get very wet, such as the inside of the upper arm and the sides of the torso.

At the very least the tops of the shoulders and the upper chest need to be just plastic. Just fucking plastic like a slicker from the 50's. (it could be a separate overhanging shelf of plastic, like a duster type of thing)

Any time I'm browsing REI or whatever these days and see a jacket labelled waterproof, I think "like hell it is".

1 comment:

krstffr said...

YES!! This is the best blog ever. Thank you.

old rants