12-03-09 - Web

Jeebus the new Google fade in is fucking retarded. Seriously fucking quit it. What kind of fucking ridiculous stupid fucking retard thought of that.

"I know, let's hide all the buttons that users want to click, people will love that".

"You know what would make this page great? If it took longer to load and offered no more features."

You're fired.

It's really annoying the way I can't "own" the web. I can't freeze web pages at versions that I like. People keep changing shit under me just when I get it worked out nice. My banks and credit cards and such keep making their pages worse and worse, adding more Flash and fucking animations and gizmos and shit that just make it so much harder to find things. The fucking Chase pages have some kind of adaptive menu system where they never show you all the sub-pages in one place so you have to navigate a literal labrynth of links to find the page you want (ala Zork). Even that would be okay if it just stayed the same because I could memorize the steps, but every few months they change it so I have to go hunting again.


timmeh said...

Can't... stop... lol'ing...

cbloom said...

Anon points out that the search box actually loads faster now (though for people like me who are mainly going to google home to get to sub-pages, it is slower).

Aside from the speed issue, my big complaint is with fading or moving UI elements in general.

If I was a fucking pilot with a big control panel in front of me, I want all my buttons to be visible and in the same damn place all the time, I don't want the fucking landing gear button to fade out after I take off, or the buttons to move around based on frequency of use.

WTF you modern UI designers are smoking crack. I think it's part of the Apple form over function disease.

Autodidactic Asphyxiation said...

I was anon; it happened to be that it was more convenient to respond over e-mail rather Blogger (cbloom might argue this is always the case!) and I had some off-topic crap to ask.

Anyway, human factors != ui design, although I agree the slow fades are always gratuitous. The fade should take less than half a second (Windows default UI transition period is 400 ms).

cbloom said...

"it happened to be that it was more convenient to respond over e-mail rather Blogger"

I certainly hate writing in this damn box, so if sending me an email means I get a better response, then I certainly encourage that. emails are also easier to keep in a thread of conversation for the time being. Maybe some day blog & email will merge in Wave.

old rants