This is a shitty position to be in (not wanting to try all the way so you intentionally don't try at all). It would be much better if you could just try a little bit. The problem is that it works so well. When you try a little bit, the world mocks you. They don't appreciate the fact that you're making an effort, showing what you can do, even if you suck.
I think when girls do the whole "do I look fat?" or "you don't really love me" routines, obviously it's partly insecurity, but it's also a dominance game. They get you to prostate yourself before them, to whimper and beg them to feel okay, they humiliate you, and then if you have performed like the lowly dog that you are to their liking, they show mercy and forgive you.
Women use their emotional powers to manipulate and attack men; when women feel vulnerable or demeaned they lash out with painful words. This is a balance for the physical dominance of the male; we could beat them up at any time and they're a little terrified of that and try to defend themselves and achieve their own sort of power in a relationship. It's only fair, I don't think I'm saying anything controversial; men are very naive about interpersonal war, most women are far more adept at it, and of course they use their skills for their benefit. Women use their sly emotional dominance skills on other women of course, but also on their lover, something that most men find terrifying and revolting. There's a power gap - both sides know the man is physically more powerful, and that's a shitty feeling for the woman to have, even if you never use that power. It's sort of like a non-nuclear state being in negotations with a nuclear state. Like hey, we know you're never gonna use the nukes, but dude you have a picture of one on the wall, that makes us feel a bit uncomfortable here.