1/28/2009

01-27-09 - Apartments

Things you should not do in apartments :

Clog dancing.  Irish dancing.  Texan line dancing.  Tap dancing.  Really any kind of jig or stomping.

Amateur Carpentry.  Really anything involving regular hammering.

Learn to play a new instrument.  Especially not a string instrument, or brass, or drums.

Bowling.  Really indoor sports of any sort other than like maybe paper football.

Good noises to hear :


Someone skilled playing piano.  And some nice sonata type stuff, some Chopin maybe, not some banging Rachmaninoff.

People having sex.  But only if I mainly hear a girl moaning gently, no male grunting or bedframe banging.

Kittens.  No, I've never heard kittens, but just the idea of hearing kittens sounds appealing.

Children playing.  A mother singing lullabies.

One bad thing about living in Washington is that if I kill my upstairs neighbor it would be harder to escape to Mexico. Sure I could run to Canada, but it's way more likely I'd be extredited, and I couldn't keep driving through Central America and buy a bar in Colombia and secretly help the rebels while seducing a senorita. Plus I'd have to live in Canada (shudder).

3 comments:

brian said...

I do lots of amateur carpentry in my place, and drum a bunch too. Only fake drums, though. But real hammering and power tools.

cbloom said...

Dear god.

Sly said...

Charles, you've just found out who leaves above you ;)

old rants