07-29-08 - 1

When someone is just outspoken and casual about quickly saying when they're unhappy, it really makes it comfortable and easy to be around them. It's not the actual statements that help so much - it's knowing that they would say something if they were bothered. Like if you have a roommate and they instantly just say "hey, whoah, don't do that" when you bother them, and it's no big deal, then you can just do what you want and not worry, because if you're bothering they'll say something, so you know the silence means approval. The worst roommate is the one who silently fumes and doesn't say anything for hours until it's a huge issue and then it turns into a big fight. It's not the fight that's so bad, it's the way it affects your every moment, you have to keep looking over and trying to read their body language to see if you're doing anything bad. It makes you anxious and on-edge every moment. Silence becomes a torturous uncertainty.

I can definitely be the silent fumer sometimes, but I'm working hard to be the quick casual complainer. Of course someone who complains too often is also bad. Life is hard.

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