06-04-08 - 1

I always thought "best thing since sliced bread" was kind of ironic/odd because sliced bread fucking sucks, it's a retarded invention, part of the convenience over quality shitty phase of modern invention that spawned the TV dinner and canned everything. How fucking hard is it to slice your own bread? It takes like 2 seconds, and it means the bread stays much fresher much longer without preservatives, plus you can slice it the way you want instead of a fixed predecided way. A better expression would be "best thing since scissors" since scissors rock (they rock paper anyway), or "finest find since the frost free freezer".

Actually "worst thing since sliced bread" would be good, but you can't actually say things like that in the real world because you waste your life explaining.

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old rants