11/20/2007

11-20-07 - 1

Hitman movie continues a long line of "why the fuck did they decide to make a movie out of this videogame?" ; it has no story, no characters, absolutely nothing that suggests it would make an interesting movie. Plus there have been a billion other hitman-based movies already that are all better. I mean the only thing worse would be a Doom movie or a Dungeon Siege movie or a Mario Brothers movie, AMIRITE ?

Anyway, this reviewer pissed me off :

Ultimately Hitman is about bullets, blood, and bombs. For die-hard fans of the videogame, there is much to relish in terms of cobblestone car chases, punishing fistfights, cool weaponry, impossible physical feats, and ear-popping gun battles that rage through exclusive hotels in exotic locations.

Yeah, we like videogames with lots of action, therefore we will like movies that have nothing but action. Nevermind the fact that you aren't actually doing those things when you watch a movie, which takes away the whole fun and immersion of the violence. Maybe they should make a movie based on Unreal Tournament. All they have to do is put in tons of shooting and respawning and it will be a favorite of video game fans! Or they could make a movie about Chess and just show nothing but pieces moving around the board. I mean, people who play chess just see the pieces moving, who needs stories or characters in the movie!? If you have no clue WTF you are talking about then just shut the fuck up.

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